Author: JL

Cancer free? Maybe.

31st March 2020, Phonecall The news I’ve been waiting for ​The prof called, the pelvic node test results are in and they’re negative.  So I’m officially cancer free! Or am I? It’s probably safer to say there’s no evidence of any disease. Maybe in a few years I’ll be happy saying I’m cured. For those […]

The next chapter…

15th April, Royal Marsden Hospital, Sutton Branch, Surrey, England It’s like the first day in a new job I’m at the Royal Marsden in Surrey today. It’s a shining example of what the NHS could be if we started shooting political activists. I expected to use the one in Chelsea, but while everyone’s on COVID […]

Has anyone spoken to you about sex?

12th May 2020, Royal Marsden Hospital, Sutton, Surrey, England. Well, this is awkward I’m on day one of the chemo, and I have radiotherapy booked in later too. It’s dead posh here, they even give you an electric blanket for your arm! ​“Has anyone spoken to you about sex Mr Little?” I thought it was […]

This chemo stuff is tough..

18th May 2020, Royal Marsden Hospital, Surrey, England Chemo. What a club to be a member of. It’s week two of the chemotherapy treatment…  and the rules have changed at the Royal Marsden, as mask wearing is now mandated for all. Jo and the kids shaved my head yesterday, I clearly didn’t look menacing enough, […]

Thank fuck that’s over.

2nd June 2020, Royal Marsden Hospital, Sutton, Surrey Is it the beginning of the end? Or the end of the beginning? My chemo is complete, and I have 5 radiotherapy sessions left in the “adjuvant therapy” phase.  I’ve had enough of the 160 mile round trips every day, and I’m glad they’re almost over. After […]

It’s never simple, is it?

9th June 2020, Royal Marsden Hospital, Sutton, Surrey I have a massive burn on my cock I thought I’d gotten away with it, but that was a mistake. After 22 radiotherapy treatments, I had a pretty dramatic change in genital ethnicity, but thankfully everything was still intact.  Then, boom. A patch of skin started to […]

Pure scanxiety.

8th August 2020, St Anthony’s Hospital, Surrey, England. More good news Despite there being no evidence of disease now, or in remission as it’s sometimes known…  I’m in “high risk surveillance”, so I get chest, abdomen and pelvis CT scans every 3 months for 3 years. Then scans twice a year for two years. I’ve […]

Under surveillance.

22nd October 2020, St Anthony’s Hospital, Surrey, England.​ How has all this happened in less than 12 months? I met the professor 11 months ago, when he confirmed that I had penile cancer. I’ve actually been “cancer free” since the beginning of the year, and I’m now on surveillance. *That’s cancer free in the sense […]

9 months cancer free.

Home, 24th October 2020. I’m not sure I’ll ever really believe it It’s been almost a year since I started my penile cancer treatment, and 9 months since new disease was discovered. After taking out the sentinel nodes in my left groin, two or three cells were positive. Other than that, I’ve been cancer free. […]

Momentum.

5th November 2020, Home. When things move, they move quickly I think it was about ten days ago, maybe two weeks since I last wrote. Back then, I knew the tide was really turning on my recovery. I could just feel it. I still had swelling in my bollocks and my penis in the mornings, […]